Well, honey, when I got home late last night
You yelled at me and we got in a fight,
And though you say you might just leave your man,
Please listen while I tell you what I can.
DO NOT STEAL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL!
This poem copyright 1995, 2006 by Robert H. Beeman.
At five o'clock that quittin' whistle blew:
I left the plant the way I always do,
And started drivin' home, but don't you see,
Some aliens from space abducted me!
DO NOT STEAL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL!
This poem copyright 1995, 2006 by Robert H. Beeman.
        A saucer came from somewhere in the skies,
        And out stepped lots of dudes with bulgin' eyes,
        With great big heads and pale, death-like skin.
        The things they did to me were just a sin!
DO NOT STEAL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL!
This poem copyright 1995, 2006 by Robert H. Beeman.
They wrecked my truck and took me up in space,
And shoved a bunch of probes into my face.
They tore my clothes and rubbed my face with dirt,
And one of them smeared lipstick on my shirt!
DO NOT STEAL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL!
This poem copyright 1995, 2006 by Robert H. Beeman.
They made me numb and stiff from head to toes,
And gave me this black eye and bloody nose!
I had to drink some stuff, or face sure death,
And that explains the liquor on my breath.
DO NOT STEAL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL!
This poem copyright 1995, 2006 by Robert H. Beeman.
        A saucer came from somewhere in the skies,
        And out stepped lots of dudes with bulgin' eyes,
        With great big heads and pale, death-like skin.
        The things they did to me were just a sin!
DO NOT STEAL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL!
This poem copyright 1995, 2006 by Robert H. Beeman.
So honey, please don't think I'm tellin' lies
About what happened out there in the skies,
You need to stay right here beside your man,
And give me all the lovin' that you can.

DO NOT STEAL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL!
This poem copyright 1995, 2006 by Robert H. Beeman.
You know I never meant to do you wrong,
Don't blame me 'cause they kept me there so long.
That saucer girl means nothin' to me now.
I don't know why she did that, anyhow.
DO NOT STEAL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL!
This poem copyright 1995, 2006 by Robert H. Beeman.
        A saucer came from somewhere in the skies,
        And out stepped lots of dudes with bulgin' eyes,
        With great big heads and pale, death-like skin.
        The things they did to me were just a sin!
DO NOT STEAL COPYRIGHTED MATERIAL!
This poem copyright 1995, 2006 by Robert H. Beeman.
    - R. H. Beeman © 1992, 2006.
      All Rights Reserved.